


We've lived in the shadows for too long

by angietwist



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Actors, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Coming Out, Divorce, GRADENCE - Freeform, Gay Sex, Gravebone, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-12
Updated: 2017-12-14
Packaged: 2019-02-14 00:50:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12996231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angietwist/pseuds/angietwist
Summary: Credence Barebone and Percival Graves both find the roles of their lives in the new Goldstein sisters' picture. A film about passion, betrayal and intimacy between two men who weren't meant to meet, let alone fall in love.What will happen when the boundaries between fiction and reality become blurred and both men feel an attraction none of them was prepared for?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Performance In a Leading Role](https://archiveofourown.org/works/225563) by [Mad_Lori](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mad_Lori/pseuds/Mad_Lori). 



> This story was inspired by one of my favourite Johnlock fanfiction of all times, Performance in a Leading Role you can read it there http://archiveofourown.org/works/225563/chapters/341590
> 
> I also was inspired to write it because of the relationship between Timothee Chalamet and Armie Hammer who became great friends after shooting Call Me by Your Name. 
> 
> Somehow I felt like Gradence was the perfect ship for this kind of story ;)

_Breathe in. Breathe out. Relax. You’ve got this._  
Credence Barebone entered the audition room and was welcomed by two smiling faces : Queenie and Tina Goldstein, two of the boldest and progressive directors out there. When they’d contacted him to do an audition, he hadn’t even bothered reading the script before accepting. Their last movie, _'The Hollows'_ , a movie about people transforming into black shapes and wrecking havoc in the streets, was groundbreaking. Mixing horror and drama, it was a metaphor for how our insecurities transform us and destroy our lives and the lives of those around us. It had obviously received Golden Globes and Oscars nominations and Credence couldn’t believe these women had thought about him for their new movie. 

In the room was a third person, not smiling but rather busy reading a script, brows furrowed in concentration. Percival Graves. The Percival Graves.  
He was much more experienced than Credence and had done many movies, big and small. He’d won several Oscars for best actor and was famous for being very serious about each part he got. He didn’t care about fame or money, all he wanted was to act. You could see the passion he brought to each movie he did, he gave them his all.  
Today they would read together for the same film, a story of passion and betrayal in which they would play two men who fell in love even though they were not supposed to. It was a kind of modern _'Romeo & Juliet' _ with action and drama and Credence knew it could make his career take off but a lot of today's audition would rely on his chemistry with Percival. He could not screw this up.  
Credence coughed to get the older man’s attention and Percival raised his head to acknowledge him, smiled discreetly and shook his hand.  
‘Pleased to meet you Credence’ he said, even though the seriousness of his face didn’t really express pleasure.  
‘It’s an honour Mister Graves’ Credence answered, blushing.  
‘Percival, please. We’re going to get pretty intimate today, no need to be so formal’  
Credence smiled and nodded to signify his agreement. He couldn’t believe he was going to read with Percival Graves. 

‘Okay, when you are ready.’ Tina announced after giving them the details of the scene they were to read for.  
The two actors exchanged glances to show each other they were ready.  
‘I can’t… I can’t believe you betrayed me James. I believed you. Trusted you. And you… you took my trust and used it like it didn’t mean anything to you, like I didn’t mean anything to you. It’s over’ Credence read, getting emotional just like the directions said.

‘I’m sorry Charly, I had to do it. You know I had to do it. I wasn’t supposed to meet you, love you… All of this was unplanned.’ Percival said, obviously impeccable. Credence was on the verge of tears just by looking at him. You could feel exactly what James felt and Credence used it for his own performance. 

‘So you regret it all ? You wish you could have just sticked to the plan and killed me like you killed my father ? Is that what you’re saying ?’ the younger man answered, getting angry.  
Percival got closer to him slowly, his breathing heavy and loud, took his hand in his own and slowly brought the young man’s head to his shoulder.  
‘I could never regret it. If you die I’ll die with you. I love you.’ 

They stared at each other for a few minutes, tears in their eyes and as they were bringing their faces closer together to kiss they heard Queenie’s voice :  
‘And Cut ! Thank you boys. That was great ! Wasn’t it Tina ?’ 

‘It was incredible ! You guys do have chemistry. We’ll have to send the tape to the producers to get their approval of course, but I think my sister and I both agree that you’re the perfect match for this movie.’ 

‘Thanks so much ladies. I’ll be waiting for your call. Now if you'll excuse me I have a flight to catch. Credence’ Percival said extending his hand to the young actor to shake it. They smiled at each other, a bit embarrassed by the intimacy they'd just shared. 

‘He’s really impressive isn’t he ?’ Queenie asked Credence with a smile. 

‘Oh don’t mind her. She’s a bit of a groupie, aren’t you dear sister ?’ Tina asked laughing. 

‘I’m not. He’s just such a great actor. And so are you Credence, a rising star and an Oscar winner. Can you imagine how beautiful this movie will be with you two working together ?’ 

The young man nodded and they exchanged a few civilities before he had to leave for a photoshoot. He’d started out as a model and still made most of his income with this career, He’d only done a few films and tv shows but he was pretty famous in the modelling world. Today was a fashion shoot for which he had to undress a bit more than he was comfortable with and he hoped that it would soon stop if he got the part of Charly. 

As soon as he got home that night, he called his agent and best friend Newt Scamander. They’d met while Credence was starting as a model and Newt had helped him make a name for himself and not get exploited by greedy agencies. 

‘So, how’d you get along with Percival Graves the great ?’ Newt asked teasingly. 

‘Well, we didn’t have much time to talk. But I felt a good connexion while doing the scene. He’s so incredible, you could feel exactly what he was feeling. Reacting to him was easy.’ Credence said trying not too sound too much like a fanboy. 

‘I’ve heard good things about him. He’s nice and patient with his co-stars, gives them advice when they need them. But he’s also super strict on schedule. He’s apparently devoted to his wife and kids and he spends as much time as he can with them.’ 

‘Oh I didn’t know he was married, well I don’t know anything about his private life actually.’ 

‘His agent Jacob Kowalski works super hard for this. It’s actually the most important part in his contracts : the confidentiality clause. He wants to be able to maintain his privacy on every shoot, he doesn’t do personal interviews and avoids paparazzis like the plague. He’s a very mysterious man.’ Newt declared, obviously fascinated. 

They kept talking like this for a while before hanging up, both exhausted. When Credence went to bed all he could think about was the film, he really wanted the part and he realized that what he wanted most was to work with Percival. And when he finally fell asleep, that was all that mattered to him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Credence and Percival have to get a bit more physical for a rehearsal and Credence freaks out. Fortunately, Percival is here to comfort him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was inspired by an interview of Armie Hammer and Timmy Chalamet in which they explained that the director of CMBYN asked them to rehearse a kissing scene and then walked out in the middle of it ;)

It was their first rehearsal that day and Credence was too nervous to even eat breakfast. The knots in his stomach were appropriate to the situation considering his character’s torment. He could at least use his anxiety to portray his character accurately.   
Both he and Percival had gotten the parts they wanted but the Goldstein sisters wanted to test their chemistry a bit more, just to make sure they were ready to give them what they wanted and he couldn’t help thinking the sisters wanted more from him. Percival was a famous actor, he would bring his army of fans to cinemas, but Credence was still a relatively new face in the business and they knew they were taking a risk in making him their lead.   
That’s why he had been working so hard since he’d gotten the part. He knew the whole script by now, he’d memorized almost all of his lines and the cues, knew where each scene stood in the story and he’d even watched a few gay movies to make sure he knew how physical intimacy worked between two men. He wanted to be as prepared as Percival would be, he could not disappoint him. Of course he’d found out that romances worked in the same way whether they were gay or straight, but considering his lack of practical knowledge in this area, he needed as much input as he could find. 

The rehearsal was in L.A but they’d fly to Vancouver a week after and then they’d shoot a few scenes in Europe. That meant he would spend a significant amount of time with Percival in the next three months and he really hoped they would get along.   
He arrived a bit early at the studio and was doing vocal warm-ups when he heard the door open. His heart started beating faster, _calm down you idiot_ he told himself, but he couldn’t. He just wanted to impress his co-star and do something right for once. If he failed, he could only imagine Ma making fun of him.   
_‘You’re so conceited’_ she'd once told him. _‘ you think you’re better than us, that you deserve a big life in Hollywood while we rot here. But you’re worthless, don’t even think they’ll even look at you.’_  
Everytime he looked at his hands he could remember her insults and her blows… she was a tiny woman but she could hit hard.   
His thoughts were interrupted by a cough and he turned around to see Percival staring at him with concern in his eyes. 

‘Hi Credence, are you okay ?’ 

‘Oh, hi Percival. I’m fine thanks. Just getting in the mood you know.’ He answered, trying to avoid looking the man in his eyes.

‘Do you know which scene we’re going to rehearse ? I asked but the ladies wouldn’t tell me.’ Percival said, serious but friendly. 

‘Oh no I don’t. I think they wanted us to improv a bit, they wanted this to be spontaneous from what Queenie told me.’ 

‘Okay. That’s good. I still haven’t had time to learn all my lines so I won’t look unprofessional if I do a bit of improv’ he replied with a soft smile. 

Credence couldn’t believe he had come more prepared than Percival Graves. But then, maybe it was not a good thing ? Maybe he was supposed to be unprepared ? Maybe he’d done too much. His head started buzzing with ‘maybes’ and ‘what ifs’ and it probably showed on his face as Percival walked up to him and asked again if he was okay. 

Credence let out a sigh before saying ‘Yes. I’m sorry I’m weird. It’s just that I really want this to work and I’m nervous you know ? I mean of course you know you’ve done so many movies. But then you’re so experienced now you shouldn’t be nervous anymore. And now I’m telling you what you should do… okay I’ll just stop talking.’ He’d talked so fast Percival couldn’t help widening his eyes in surprise. He let out a chuckle before laying a reassuring hand on Credence’s forearm. 

‘Okay. Relax. Take deep breaths. I totally know what you feel. Just because I’ve done this 30 times already doesn’t mean I don’t get stressed out anymore okay ? You’ll be fine, trust me.’ 

30 times. He’s done this 30 times. Credence started counting the man’s movies but he snapped back to reality when he heard Tina enter the room and explain that she would film them as Queenie couldn’t be there. 

‘Okay, let’s go to scene 42.’ Tina said casually. Both men opened their scripts and looked for the scene. Credence’s heart almost stopped when he saw what scene it was. All the direction said was _‘James and Charly stare at each other. It’s raining outside and they’re drenched. They slowly get closer until their bodies are pressed against each other and they kiss. Slow at first then with passion and intensity.’_  
He couldn’t believe it was the scene they were rehearsing. They’d almost kissed during their screen test but at least they’d talked before. This scene was purely physical. Not only was it hard to show emotions only with your face and your body, but he had to do it with someone else. 

‘I’m going to put the camera on. Just start when you’re ready.’ The director declared. 

They nodded, first at her and then at each other to signal they were getting in character. It was impressive seeing the change on their facial expressions and body language. They got closer and started kissing, just like the cues said. It was clumsy at first, but after a few moments their movements flowed together and the pace was more fluid. It was exactly the way it was intended : two men who barely knew each other sharing an intimate moment for the first time.   
But when Percival started holding Credence’s head and carressing his back, the younger man came back to himself. It was as if he’d been brought back from an out-of-body experience. He tried getting back in character before anyone noticed but the touches were too much. Percival felt the tension coming from him and stepped back, both men opening their eyes at the same time. They realised they were on their own, the camera was still rolling but Tina wasn’t there. 

‘Let me turn this thing off okay ?’ Percival asked before walking away to turn the camera off. ‘What happened there Credence ? You seemed okay and then suddenly you were stiff and I felt like I was forcing myself on you. Do you have a problem with intimacy with other actors ? With men ? You know you’re not the first man…’ 

‘No no that’s not it’ Credence interrupted before he could finish. ‘I don’t have a problem with the fact that you’re a man. It’s just that… I’m not used to being touched like this. I get looked at a lot as a model but people don’t actually touch me. I guess I just need to get used to it’ 

Percival looked thoughtful for a while. He’d done some research and seen pictures of the young man. Almost naked, pale as an angel with scars on several parts of his body. No one knew where he’d gotten the scars, they were part of his mystery and appeal… the boy with the face of an angel and scars like the devil. Everyone in Hollywood suspected someone in his family was behind it but Barebone wasn’t his real name and no one knew where they could find his relatives to discover the truth.   
Percival had felt him stiffen as soon as he’d laid his hands on his neck and back… probably because these were the places where most of his scars were.   
‘We can make this work Credence, trust me’ Percival walked back to him, one step at a time ‘but I need you to trust me okay ? You’ll have to tell me exactly what you’re comfortable or uncomfortable with so we can work with and around that, okay ?’   
He had the reassuring tone of the older more experienced male figure Credence had missed all his life and for the first time since he’d entered the industry, he felt safe and protected. Maybe Percival would be his mentor, the one every young actor has. 

‘Okay Percival, thank you so much. I’ll be okay. Can we practice a bit more and maybe film this again ?’ 

Percival nodded with a smile but Tina entered the room before they could resume the scene. 

‘Sorry, Queenie called about the accomodations in Vancouver. Percival are you sure you don’t need a larger trailer for Seraphina and the boys ?’ she asked.

Percival looked kind of embarrassed but was quick to reply. ‘No thanks we’ll be fine. The boys go to school here in L.A so it wouldn’t make much sense to bring them with me’

‘Okay. I’m sorry I couldn’t watch you. Are you satisfied with the rehearsal or do you need more time ?’ 

Percival looked at Credence who clearly didn’t know what to answer. He still didn’t have the confidence to stand for himself and ask for more time to practice if he needed it. 

‘We’d love to do it again. We’re just getting familiar with each other you know’ he said with a firm tone. Tina smiled and went behind her desk. 

‘You have all day if you want. Don’t worry you’ll have a choreographer on set for the sex scenes. What we really want to make sure of right now is that you have enough chemistry.’   
Her tone was reassuring and Credence felt like he could let go, especially as Percival had taken such good care of him.   
They did the scene a few more times before being comfortable. When they finished, Tina had actual tears in her eyes. 

‘Guys, I’m seeing Charly and James, you have no idea what this means to me, to us. You’re going to make a difference with this movie, I promise.’ She stood up and went to hug them. The men smiled at each other with relief and satisfaction. This was the beginning of something big and both felt it. 

After two hours of rehearsal Credence realised he was starving, his stomach making embarrassing noises. He was about to go when Percival stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. 

‘Credence, are you hungry ? Do you want to grab a bite with me ? I’m buying. And this way we can get to know each other a bit better.’ He asked with a smile. Credence nodded and they left the building together to the place Percival wanted to take him to.   
It was weird how the older man seemed concerned and detached at the same time. He had comforted him today but didn’t seem warm at all. Maybe it was all about the movie after all, he just wanted it to be successful. There was something about him that was truly impressive : he was in control, all the time, and Credence felt like he probably didn't let many people see what was behind this polished surface.   
He didn’t know what to think of tPercival but he was sure of one thing : he had many things to learn from him, he just didn’t know how much yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the kudos and comments! I guess I'll keep writing this, I vaguely know where I'm going ;)

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, let me know what you think? Should I carry on or is this stupid? :p


End file.
